Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 37

Nothing fits. All those maternity clothes I bought don't fit. I spent the day yesterday with my belly hanging out of my maternity shirt, and having to hike up my maternity jeans over my hips. I'm convinced maternity clothes were made for the 6-7 month bump. After that, they  just assume you'll be in slippers and your husband's sweatpants.

Well, not me. Today I'm in a dress. Yes, working from home, wearing a dress. It fits, it's comfortable, and it's the last thing in my closet before laundry day. Besides, it's not so easy to shave anymore so when I do, I'm showing some leg.

At least I get to stay home from now on. The boss agreed to let me telework 100% in the last few weeks of pregnancy. It was getting hard to get dressed, get shoes on, and haul my butt to work every day. I'm not as mobile as I once was. When I walk, I cover more ground side-to-side than forward.

Besides, this saves me from the asinine comments. I'm really tired of hearing, "You look ready to pop!" Yeah. Pop you in the face, you dumbass.

It also prevents those pity and sympathy looks as I waddle down the hallway. I don't need anyone to feel bad for me. I'm capable of doing my job still.

Meanwhile, I went my first week ever without gaining any weight! Woohoo! No idea what this means, but I'm excited. A 30lb increase is enough, thanks. The doctor started talking about what to do if the baby is 1-2 weeks late. How we'd have to make a choice to induce or keep waiting. Induction means more painful contractions and increased chance of a Cesarean. Waiting longer than 2 weeks past the due date is not done very much any more and goes against today's medical standards of practice.

Today's medical standards of practice also result in 30% of women getting a Cesarean, which is a lot higher than in other 1st world nations. The WHO recommends a rate of 5-10% nationally.

So I let the doctor know I wasn't down the Cesarean. We didn't talk about it any more than that because the due date is still 3 weeks away, and we're anticipating a very normal 7lb birth weight with a low chance of a breech birth.

I started making a checklist on what to pack for the hospital. The recommended advice is to have your bags already packed two weeks ago. I find that difficult to do since you have to pack clothes and slippers and whatnot and I'm already digging through my wardrobe to find stuff to fit. Besides, don't you have a few hours of early labor before you even go to the hospital? I'm sure I can find 20 minutes to pack before the contractions are 4 minutes apart.

Anyway, the checklist freaked me out more than you'd think. I realized I didn't have nursing bras and throwaway clothes to be ruined. I ended up panicking and spending $60 at Walmart. Whatever, it's dumb to spend money on clothes this late in the pregnancy. Who knows what size I'll be. It made me feel better though, so my hubby considers that $60 well spent.

Yoga

Well, I've gone and done it. I turned into one of those New Age hippie freaks that recommends yoga for all ailments of the body.

It happened by accident, I assure you.

I started taking yoga classes about a year and half ago. They are free at work and are timed perfectly with the end of my working day. At the time, I had a case of plantar fascitiis that wouldn't go away, and the doctor recommended daily stretches to lessen the pain. Yoga is stretching, right, so what did I have to lose.

I lost my skepticism. Seriously, yoga works. It works so well that I'm recommending it to random strangers. I hear the words coming out of my mouth and see their looks of "yeah right you New Age hippie" and I think to myself, how did I get here?

I got pregnant, that's how. As I got bigger and bigger, I kept going to yoga class.When I got weight-related shin splints in the second semester, yoga took the pain away. Early in the third trimester, it eased the tension in my calves, preventing painful leg cramps (bananas helped too). Now it's late in my pregnancy and I have loads more pain - a sciatic nerve in my tailbone, pain in my lower back, legs that don't feel strong enough to carry me, and a 6lb baby that has settled into my pelvis making general movements uncomfortable.

Yoga helps all that. A few sessions of yoga and the sciatic nerve stopped screaming. My lower back gets stretched in pleasant, pain-relieving ways. My legs still feel weak, but just knowing that I can hold warrior poses is encouraging. Yoga even helps shift the baby weight around some, giving temporary relief.

So when a random pregnant woman came shuffling down the hall barely putting one foot in front of the other, she asked me if I ever had sciatic pain. I said, "Yes! Just last week and I was moving like you. Then I did a couple 30 minute sessions of yoga and felt a lot better. I kept it up throughout the week and now the pain is gone."

She gave me the crazy person look and shuffled away.

I guess I have become a yoga-loving New Age hippy. Well, whatever. All I know is that it works. Now I have my own mat, carrying bag, DVD, and yoga block. As long as I don't show up on a beach somewhere doing yoga to welcome the sunrise.

Training

I despise job training. Mostly because it takes you away from your job just so a retired ex-employee can "teach" you stuff that hasn't been relevant for three years.

It's pointless, dumb, and costly. And almost impossible to schedule because the classes pop up at the most inconvenient times and in terrible offsite locations.

The only people who can regularly go to training are the people who don't have much to do. The unproductive, unreliable ones in the office.

You can see where this is going. The unproductive people are the ones with the most training credentials and certifications. They can't actually do the work, but they can sit in a class for a week and pad their resume.

Many available jobs require these credentials. Even if you can do the work competently, without the piece of paper saying you completed the class, you aren't eligible to compete for the position.

I was recently informed of two things:
1. The boss entered my name for a bunch of awards and achievement recognitions last year, only to be rejected from the pile for my lack of training certifications. He was quite pissed and blamed me.

2. There is a job opening up that I'm perfect for, but will be competing against unproductive people with more training certifications.

I realize a majority of this is my fault. I chose to make my work a priority over job training. I stupidly thought it would speak for itself. I met the minimum training requirements of my current job and stopped taking classes. Because I didn't have time to cram them in and still get all my work done.

So now, to remain competitive with the unproductive morons, I have to take a 5 week course that is an hour from my house. I don't see this happening anytime this year since I'm expecting a baby in 4 weeks. Kid has gotta eat and momma needs to be around. Plus, I'm already missing 12 weeks of work this year. An additional 5 is just too hard to schedule. My plan is to enroll in this course and show the bosses I'm working toward another certification, but keep cancelling and rescheduling until the kid is old enough to eat solid food.

Sucks, but what are you gonna do.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 36

So only 4 weeks away. People are coming out of the woodwork with their early baby stories.

My baby came 4 weeks early.

Mine came 3 weeks early.

I went to my doctor's checkup and was already dilated 3cm.

I was dilated 5cm and was sent right over to the hospital!

Mostly, I'm good at ignoring people. Sometimes I do think to myself, "well shit. What if the baby comes this week?" 

And if he did come 4 weeks early, it wouldn't be a disaster. It would be a scramble, but within control. Yes, there is a ladder in the nursery. Yes, the wiring is hanging out of the wall. No, not everything has been washed. But we do have a bassinet, diapers, and some outfits. We have bibs and boppies and burp cloths and blankets. We'd be fine.

Speaking of the nursery, yes there are wires hanging out of the wall. I think the talk of people's babies coming early freaked the husband out. He decided last weekend that we absolutely needed an overhead light in the nursery. So he got several books on wiring, climbed into the attic, started fiddling with the light sockets, and pretty much took stuff apart. That's fine. Everyone deals with stress differently. He'll eventually install the light, or put everything back together.

It would be nice to have a clean, vacuumed nursery with everything put away and decorated with cute crap, but hey. That's for Pinterest. We're living in the real world.

I do have my 36 week doctor checkup in two days. That's when they start measuring the cervix to determine.....well, I'm not sure what they are doing. I suppose checking for overall health, dilation, infection, and whatnot. I'm so used to seeing the doctor weekly that I stopped caring what the appointments were for. Step on the scale, pee in a cup, listen to the heartbeat, see you next week.

Anyway, I suppose it's time to start packing a hospital bag. I'm at the point when people ask, "when are you do?" I can simply say the 20th and not specify the month. If that's not an indication we're getting close, I'm not sure what is.

We did narrow the names down to a top 3. An equal top 3. So we're going to wait to see what the kid looks like before picking the final name. Hopefully he looks the same to both of us and won't be a difficult discussion. On a funny note, while I was cleaning out the nursery closet, I found a notebook that had my handwritten wedding notes, plans, and bridal shower gift list. It also had notes from the trip to the dog's breeder where we put an asterisk next to the puppy with the yellow collar as being the best dog for us. So when I found this notebook, I knew that's where we'd make our naming lists for the baby. I'll also use it for the hospital bag checklist and to track contractions.

Book Review - The Selection

Ah, so much love. The Selection by Kiera Cass is really, really well written.

It took me a while to get to this book because 1) it has a foo-foo dress on the cover, and 2) the synopsis sounds way too much like The Bachelor.

35 girls get picked to go live in the palace, competing for the hand of the prince. The winner marries the prince, becomes princess, and eventual queen.

It's really a lot better than that though. The world building is amazing. After WWIV, North America is reinvented as a new country. It's broken into provinces, with a ruling family instead of a president. There is also a caste system, ranking One (royalty) to Eights (homeless). The protagonist is a Five, the artisan caste. She is a singer and plays instruments for money at parties. Most of the time, her family has enough to eat.

She is secretly in love with a Six, who she meets every night in the treehouse after curfew. Sixes are the maids and laborers. He never has enough to eat.

 Meanwhile, the prince is actually a cool dude. He is caring, intelligent, and compassionate. He's very easy to like.

It sounds like it's leading into a crappy love triangle, but it didn't at all. Rather than choosing between two guys, it was choosing which direction her life would take. She could marry her first love and struggle with starvation for the rest of her life. Or she could pursue the prince, try to win the competition and become queen. Or she could let things fall where they may and see where life takes her after the Selection. It was really well written.

As for the other girls, there was only some cattiness and backstabbing. Most of the girls have their own set of hardships, but the author doesn't go into those. Sometimes a girl will cry or say something cryptic, hinting at a possible backstory. Everyone, even the supporting characters, have depth.

There's a lot of mystery in the book too; many unanswered questions. Why are there no history books anymore? What really happened in WWIII and WWIV? Who are the rebels and what do they want? How was the caste system created?

I can't wait for the sequel. If it's anything like The Selection, it'll be a seriously good read.

Assault Weapons

I'll warn you up front; I have a pretty unpopular opinion about banning assault weapons. Nearly everyone I talked to has looked at me like I just said the Dumbest Thing Ever.

So I agree that something needs to be done about gun violence in this country. A young man in Philadelphia has a greater chance of being shot than a soldier in Afghanistan. Clearly whatever we're doing is not working.

Yet the problem I have is when people say, "You shouldn't be allowed to buy an assault rifle. Why do you need one?"

Well, I have a samurai sword I don't need. Also keep a serious utility knife by the bed. Not to mention all the baseball bats and power tools that could do serious damage.

I don't need any of these, but I want them and I bought them. I'm concerned this line of thinking will expand to other types of weapons. Swords, nun-chucks, throwing stars, machetes, etc.

But none of those are weapons that can kill crowds of people, you say.

That is true. If I wanted to take out a crowd, I can get all the supplies I need from a hardware store and make a pipe bomb. Just saying.

Look, my point is the weapon itself is just a blunt object. Like my samurai sword, it is a display item in the homes of collectors. Without ammunition, it's just a weird paper weight.

That's right, ammo is the real danger, not the weapon. Being able to buy armor piercing rounds, hollow points, or 30 round magazines of 5.56mm or 7.62mm. Is the sniper rifle a problem or the 50 caliber ammunition?

A real chicken and egg argument.

Guns and weapons have always been valuable and highly collectible among historians and war buffs. Ammo, not so much. I think if you ban the weapon, you increase the black market. If you ban the ammo, well there would still be a black market for it, but not as large. And if confiscated, ammo is easier to render inert and dispose. Look up Explosive Ordinance Disposal (EOD) if you don't believe me.

It also gets around the second amendment nicely. Sure you have the right to bear arms, but it doesn't say anything about ammo.

My iPhone

Alright. I love my iPhone. It is my very first smartphone. I thought I could get through life without one, but what would be the point of that? It's just so fun and convenient.

The reason we didn't get smartphones years ago is because we're cheap. We have laptops and we're around computers everyday at work. I'm not even allowed to have a phone at work; that's about 9 hours a day where paying for a data plan is worthless. It's not just me either, the husband doesn't get reception at work due to equipment interference. We couldn't justify the cost of two smartphones and a family data plan.

Then Christmas came and it just seemed like a good gift to get each other. Besides, I'll be home on maternity leave for 3 months this year. Having a handheld device would make more sense than trying to fit a laptop and baby on my lap.

The baby is not here yet, but I'm addicted to my phone already. So is hubby. Gmail, Facebook, Words with Friends, Scramble, Plants vs Zombies, Family Feud, Google Maps, Etsy. We have to charge our phones daily.

Facetime is pretty awesome too.

And I know I don't need any of this. We got along fine without it for years. It's just too damn fun. What a convenient way to add more pictures of my dog to the internet.

Just wish it were cheaper.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 35

So hey! We're all caught up on the pregnancy chronicles blog posts. From now on, it'll be in real time.

The work continues on the nursery. More laundry, more purchases. I ordered a toy chest because the toys we got from the shower had babies of their own. I haven't bought a single toy; I don't know where they all came from. Hubby bought and assembled closet shelves last night. Now we have a place for all those extra blankets and bibs and books.

Funny how baby stuff starts with B.
blanket
bib
burp cloth
Bumpo
bassinet
bedding
books
bottle
breast pump
Boppy
bouncer

When we get tired in the evening, every word starts with a "b" syllable. "Hand me that b-onesie please."

Meanwhile, my discomfort grows. The baby dropped early. What that means is he's no longer kicking my ribs, but sitting directly on my bladder. I'm trying hard not to waddle since that is undignified. And it makes people feel bad for you at work. Still, it's difficult with a 5 pounder in your pelvis.

Also got to feel what a pinched sciatic nerve feels like.
See the picture of the buttocks on the left? There's a big nerve cluster that comes out of your tailbone. In pregnancy, this nerve - the sciatic nerve - gets a bit squeezed from the weight of an enormous uterus.

Luckily my pain only lasted 1 day. I did some yoga, took Tylenol, had a hot water bottle, and made sure to sleep with a pillow between my legs.

But dang, that was some pain in the butt. Every time I stood up, I had to wait several minutes (minutes, not seconds) for the pain to stabilize so my right side could bear my weight. It was just the transition from sitting to standing that was killer. I could walk around after I waited a few minutes.

I think I'll do some yoga every day from now on.

Lastly, I had a little surprise at the pharmacy. I refilled my prenatal vitamins, only to find out the doctor changed my type from Vitafol-OB to Vitafol-One+DHA. The difference? Besides some omega-3 fats, about $120. Yup, I normally pay $30 for a 90 day supply. These suckers cost $150 after insurance! I returned them to the pharmacy, called the doctor, asked her change the prescription to something else. She said I needed the DHA for the baby's brain health and faxed over Vitafol-OB+DHA.

Also $150.

I told the pharmacist I couldn't afford it and did some research online. Turns out you can buy these shitters OTC. I got Nordic Naturals from Amazon - 90 day supply for about $25. Why the blazes did I ever need a prescription?? These are just vitamins for crap's sake, not antibiotics or pain meds. There's nothing to justify the $150 co-pay. I'll compare the ingredients when the Amazon shipment arrives, but at first glance, they looked identical to me.

Healthcare rip off.

Book Review - 12:21

Eh. It was okay. One of those "what-if" thrillers. What if the Mayan prediction came true?

12:21 is about an epidemic that is released when a Mayan artifact is smuggled into Los Angeles. The story follows a linguist and a doctor who attempt to save the world.

Honestly, not enough story or character-driven plot. This is one of those instances where the author wants to show how much research he did in writing this novel. That's great; I'm glad we have people in the world that smart. I'd just rather have  good characters in the story than think about how much work the author did. The author should be invisible.

Here's a hint: if the afterword contains encyclopedic knowledge of what is true about Mayan culture, cities, prion diseases, as well as information on what is truth and fiction, it's possible you put too much research into the novel.

Too much info on the Mayan civilization and all you get is a longer book. It  felt like it took forever to read.

Anyway, the story is similar to Outbreak except half of it is medical info and the other half is Mayan info. If you like smart thrillers, you might like this. It's just not my thing.

Baby Shower Guide

Now having been on both sides of the baby shower - a participant of many and guest of honor at my own - I'm qualified enough to dole out advice. The next shower I go to, I will rock that party.

In the past, I usually bought something off the registry. I put the gift receipt in the card and couldn't care if they returned it or not. I never look through Facebook photos to see if the baby was wearing the thing or playing with the thing or puking on the thing. I bought it, stuck it in a bag with some tissue paper,  and wiped my hands of it.

Sound familiar?

If you'd like to break out of the baby shower doldrums (because what's worse than a Babies R' Us registry print out? I mean seriously, can the item descriptions get any more vague?? You have to match barcodes just to be sure it's what they asked for.), here are a few tips on gifts to give the expectant mother.

1. She's going to get a lot of clothes. New clothes, old clothes, cute clothes, different size clothes. Give her a way to organize it. The next day after the shower, I bought these closet dividers because I needed some way to separate the sizes and keep them that way. It's one of those things you don't think about until you see the mountain of onesies, sleepsacks, and wee little things that you have to wash and inventory.

2. Speaking of laundry, nothing like a bottle of Dreft as a gift. It may not be fun or glamorous but the parents will need to wash all those new and used clothing items. This is another thing I didn't think about on the registry but had to buy right away.

3. Oh those gift receipts. Babies R Us is the worst. There is no item description - just a bar code. So picture this scenario: you open the gift, pass the clothes around, and when they come back, they get loaded into another bag that fits into the car. Now you have a gift receipt with no clue what it's for. It's not just one gift receipt either; it's a stack of them. If you give clothes, blanket, bibs, burbs....basically anything cloth, pin the receipt to the item directly. If it's not a fabric item, tape the gift receipt to the gift.

4. Instead of toys, thinking about a toy chest or toy storage device. Maybe shelves or bins or something that slides under the crib.

5. Think about groupons or gift certificates for photography services, meal/grocery deliveries, birth announcements, or a housecleaner. Something to help out the family after the baby arrives.

6. Batteries.

7. Don't get something that requires the parents to do extra work. Like journals, scrapbooks, keepsakes, etc. There's already so much assembly for every piece of gear you get. Plus all the laundry to wash the clothes and sheets before the baby comes. Organzing the nursery is a chore too. While a scrapbook might be an awesome thing to have, I'd prefer not to have an empty one.

8. Or go with funny signs to keep solicitors away. I don't know about you, but we get a ton of people to the door asking for donations and to seal the driveway. Last night, I just let the dogs bark at the person until he left. (he was wearing an orange shirt and had a clipboard. Dead giveaway for magazine salesman.) Another thing you can do is a garden flag or outside banner to announce the new arrival to the neighborhood. Something to welcome the new mom home from the hospital.

So if you want to give a thoughtful gift but don't have time to sew a quilt or crochet a blanket, I recommend one of the options above. Even if the new mom doesn't know she needs it yet.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 34

So wow! Big happenings this week. I was thinking about breaking this into two posts - one for the baby shower and one for the childbirth class. But no, it'll just be really long. You might want to get a snack and come back.

First, my shower was awesome. I can't believe how many people came, especially considering it was a drive for most everyone. Some of them I hadn't seen in years. It was surprising to receive that kind of heartfelt support from people, especially since baby showers can be kind of dull, watching a huge uncomfortable woman open gift after gift. I can't think of a good word to describe the feeling seeing the house jammed packed full of relatives who were there for me. Profound enlightenment? Gratitude? It'll come to me. It's humbling to know that even though family may not live close, but they are a phone call, email, or invite away. I'm grateful for that, as I know many people who do not have such support.

And it's not just showing up at the shower. I received beautiful handmade gifts that must've taken FOREVER. People took the time to shop and wrap gifts and showed up with a smile. It's so easy just to send a gift card.

The food was wonderful, the company fantastic, and the gifts generous. I can easily say it was a good day I'll remember forever.

And wow. Did we get some stuff for the baby. We're taking inventory this week of what we have, what we need to get, and how best to use the gift cards in combination with the registry completion discount. We maximize cost effectiveness in our household.

The next day we took a 4 hour childbirth express class at the hospital. It goes over the basics of what you need to know about delivery and labor. It was either this or a 7 week course, 2 hours per week. That wasn't happening.  Anyway, we were subjected to movies, diagrams, and the personal questions of other couples in the class. Pretty gross. There's no way I'm coming out of this with any dignity.

Parts of the class made me feel better; other parts made it worse. The hospital rooms were large and cheerful. The bed allows you to sit completely upright like you are giving birth upon a throne. That was the cool part. The scary stuff was all the medical procedures - episiotomy, Cesarian, even the epidural going dangerously close to your spinal column. Did you know labor hurts a boatload more when you are induced? Because the contractions are medically strengthened. Pass on that thanks.

And I found out that you aren't supposed to use a bottle until the 4th week. That's an entire month where another living creature is entirely dependent on me and no one else. This didn't hit me until now because I have a super supportive husband. We've always done things 50/50; I had a picture  of me doing half the feedings and him doing the other half. Same with diapers and whatever else comes up. I have to say, WTF here.

I left the class a bit more freaked out than reassured. Hubby is only taking the first 2 weeks off before he goes back to work. This to conserve sick leave in case a day care is not available at the end of my 12 week maternity leave.  After those two weeks though, I somehow have to keep an infant alive by myself with only the dog and occasional family members helping out. This is my reward? After 9 months of gestational pains this is what the universe gives me? Insomnia, abandonment, and depression?

Did you know that 80% of new parents suffer from postpartum depression? Out of those 80%, 20% need treatment for it. I learned that in class.

This is nuts. I can't believe just anyone is allowed to be a parent. The government really needs to license this shit.

I think the real purpose of a baby shower is to remind you of all the family you do have. So when you're home alone with a newborn, feeling depressed and abandoned, think about everyone who showed up at the shower and pick a phone number from the list.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 33

Hooray! Christmas! A week of hanging out at my parents house with people to pamper me! It's good timing because I can't even put my socks on straight. Hubby has been doing that and clipping my toenails, poor man.

I have to say, it's really nice to have people around to bring me milk and cookies so I don't have to roll myself off the couch. Plus, there are three other dogs that can entertain my crazy nut. I don't have to walk him as far!

And everyone did an excellent job of buying gifts for me, not the baby. We may be one entity at the moment, but I appreciate being treated as an individual, not a mommy. Even the onesie my brother bought was really for me because it had a dragon on it and I like dragons.

As for presents, I finally got an iPhone. That way I can take pictures and video of the baby and clog everyone's Facebook wall. It also has Facetime so I can show everyone the baby without having to use Skype.

I also got indoor/outdoor slippers because I can't reach my feet (wonder if I can get permission to wear them to work). Avengers, Hunger Games, books, yoga mat and prenatal DVD, sewing supplies, and a custom-made computer program to help manage inventory for my collar business. Overall, pretty awesome stuff.

I do need to mention a certain Etsy shop where I bought some cute shirts for the family. Signatureshirts sells this Real Men Change Diapers for $15.95. The husband has already worn it even though he has not changed a diaper yet. I dunno, I think it's a way for him to tell people he's going to be a dad since he doesn't have the giant belly to announce it for him.

Anyway, if you're going to a baby shower anytime soon, check out this shop and get the father-to-be something fun.

Goodreads Challenge

Alright. I officially fell short of my goal to read 100 books in 2012. But I came damn close. 92 was the final count.

If you're wondering if I actually did read these books, yes I did. Even did reviews for many of them and posted them on this blog. Ask me about any of them, I'll tell you the plot.

I did mostly pick smaller, quicker-to-read books. There was some George RR Martin in there and other high fantasy. Only 2 short stories, which I thought should count since each Martin book was 1,000 pages.

I ended up abandoning 10 books. Those didn't count toward the total because I didn't finish reading them. Because I needed to average 2 books a week, I couldn't afford to waste time on something that dragged or put me to sleep.

I signed up for 2013, but for half as many. With a baby coming this year, I probably won't have the time or the energy to put much into reading. I hope that's not the case because it's one of my favorite things to do. With any luck, I'll hit 50 books by August or September. And no, Goodnight Moon doesn't count.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 32

Last week of work in 2012! When I go back in 2013, I'll be 8 months pregnant. 8 months pregnant in a cubicle. There's something wrong with that, I think.

Anyway, not much going on. The glider rocker arrived and is in the nursery. The dog thanks us for his new chair. It's right by the window so he watches the squirrels. This might be an issue.

The pregnancy has progressed into the zone where the doctor wants to see me every two weeks. I dunno, maybe they like analyzing pee. My tests haven't been great lately. I ate a can of tuna fish and a cough drop and my sugar levels still looked like I had been snacking on cookies all day. I may have to pee in more cups and do more tests. Who knows. I passed the glucose test, so I'm sure it's nothing.

Next week is Christmas and probably the last week I can travel away from home. Have to be close to my doctor and my hospital from now on. I can't tell if I'm looking forward to birth or nervous about it. I waiver back and forth. I think I'll feel better after the tour of the hospital.

Sorry this post is short, but the weeks go by pretty quickly. I blinked and I'm 25lbs heavier and can't get off the couch. It feels like time is flying.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 31

Just got back from our babymoon in Miami! We probably wouldn't have gone on vacation this late in the pregnancy and this close to Christmas, but a cousin was getting married in Florida. I'm a big believer in not skipping family events unless you have a seriously good reason. I've been feeling good, the doctor said it was okay, and I have enough vacation leave, so off we went.

And had a fabulous time. We got tropical fruit smoothies and empanadas at a farmer's market stand. Went to the Seaquarium to catch the dolphin shows. Hung out with family, ate Cuban food, and went out for ice cream in the evenings.

I had to wear yoga pants and t-shirts because all my maternity clothes are for winter. I thought about going to a thrift shop and getting some shorts, but didn't bother. I drank water when I got hot, dipped my feet in the ocean, or found some AC.

Unfortunately it was a lot of walking. We were smart about booking the hotel in a central location on Miami Beach. Yes, it was pricey ($30 a day to park!), but we had to minimize the amount of time I was on my feet. Even so with the wedding (dancing), going to the farmer's market (1.5 miles), walking back along the beach (1.5 miles in SAND), and going out to ice cream (1 mile)....my calves were screaming. I stretched every opportunity I could.

It still didn't prevent  my very first leg cramp. We hadn't even woken up for the day yet. I rolled over, stretched out my legs and WHAM. I felt my calf muscle shift upwards, all by itself, and harden into a ball of spasming rage.

I started screaming and flailing about. Husband wrestled my leg down and started massaging the cramp away. Probably not how he wanted to wake up. It took a few minutes to pass and wasn't quite right for the rest of the day. Actually, it's still a little weak. When I drive the car, I can feel it start to cramp again. I have to switch to my left foot when that happens.

Other than that, things are good. I'm sleeping like I'm unconscious and the doctor said yesterday that I can pretty much eat as much as I want. Hello donuts!

What Did You Do Today?

One thing I'm dreading about maternity leave is the terrible spousal question, "What did you do today?"

It's actually not a fair question, not for stay-at-home parents, or if you simply have the day off. Just because I'm home doesn't mean I need to accomplish everything on the to-do list.

I have every second Friday off because I work 9 hour days. On those days, I rehearse in my head my response to What did you do today?

 And it sucks.

It's my day off. I should be allowed to watch a marathon of Avatar: The Last Airbender on Nickelodeon if I wanted to. But no, I usually end up cleaning something, running errands, making phone calls, and cooking. I suck at cooking. I'd rather be at work.

Which is why it's not a fair question. What did I do today? I relaxed. Which made me happy. Which should make you happy. I recharged, checked out, got some sleep, read a book, played Plants vs Zombies for hours. I took the day off!

When the roles are reversed - when I'm at work and the hubby is home - I do my best to have no expectations. Yeah there are projects to do around the house. Errands to run, laundry to wash. I know to expect dirty dishes in the sink because loading and unloading the dishwasher is typically my job. And that's okay. Even if I have to keep reminding myself that it's okay.

I also vow never to ask, "What did you do today?" I'm not his boss; he's not accountable to me to get tasks done. It's better to be surprised by the empty dishwasher rather than expect it. It's the difference between appreciating the stuff he does rather than getting disappointed and starting an argument about the stuff he didn't do.

Maybe that's not revolutionary stuff. Maybe other people know this already. This one simple question What did you do today has taught me a lot on how to stay happily married. Look for the stuff your spouse does do and thank them for it. Don't focus on what they didn't do.

Pregnancy Chronicles - Week 30

Week 30, how frightening is that?

Actually not so much. I'm not scared of the delivery, just the labor contractions. You know, the part before the epidural. In the early stage of labor, contractions last 30-45 seconds and come every 5 minutes or so. Books say I'll be able to talk through them, maybe even walk around the house. This could take 6-12 hours.

Yes, that's 6-12 hours of contractions every few minutes. We're not even in the active stage of labor yet.

Shit gets serious now. Contractions are more frequent, longer, and stronger. Here's a quote that I love:
<blockquote>As a general rule, once you've had regular, painful contractions (each lasting about 60 seconds) every five minutes for an hour, it's time to call your midwife or doctor and head to the hospital or birth center.</blockquote>

Active labor typically lasts 4-8 hours. You're expected to do this without pain medication until the epidural can be administered.

This is why I stopped reading books. I'm tempted to watch a few videos on YouTube, but I'm worried that will be even more scary. We'll see what happens in the childbirth class we signed up for.

Meanwhile, I'm now seeing the doctor every two weeks. You know, so they can analyze my pee. Whatever, it's fine. I have plenty of leave at work and zero copays with my insurance. I haven't paid a thing except $10 a month for pre-natal vitamins. The world really does congratulate you for being pregnant.

The crib is assembled! The nursery is painted, curtains hung. Shower gifts are starting to arrive at the house. The dog training is going well. We have appointments at day cares next week.

Mostly, I'm pretty comfortable with my largeness. I still get cramps in my calves, but yoga makes them go away. There's a sharp pain in my rib the doctor called "neuro-muscular". I think that means the baby is pinching a nerve. The pain goes away when I left my arm over my head. I may look crazy but at least I can get relief.

Oh, had to get all new bras again. Hooray for Walmart pricing and Fruit of the Loom comfort.

At the end of this week, we're going on a babymoon to Florida. It's actually for a family wedding, but we booked a hotel on the beach for a few extra days. Poor puppy is in boarding. I'm looking forward to relaxing and reading some books. Maybe some sightseeing if I'm up to walking. I thought about booking a massage at the hotel spa, but $140 for 50 minutes is a little nuts. I can get a Groupon and get three of those at home.

Happy New Year!