I sit in row G. There are rows A-J with 16 people per row. I sit on the even side of the building. If you slice the building in half with a giant mirror, there are even and odd sides. With rows A-J on both sides.
If you are following the math, there are 320 cubicle workers per floor, all sitting in an open air environment with 4ft cubicle walls.
Add about another 100 offices and you get a shitload of people.
I'm telling you this to paint a picture of my irritation. Massive cube farm - keep that image in your head.
Now, subtract the noise. Which is a constant roar throughout the day. Phones, conversations, keyboards. Hit the mute button.
Subtract the people walking by. They gotta get coffee, go to the restroom, go to meetings, go to the printer. Remove them from the picture.
Better, right?
NO.
Because on top of the cube farm environment, the construction company that made this building didn't put enough dampeners in the floor.
What does that mean?
It means the jerk next to me has a nervous habit where he bounces his foot when he speaks. Or breathes. It means when he does this, the beam below the floor picks up the movement and amplifies it down the row.
Yes, the slightest movement of someone bouncing their leg is enough to turn my cubicle into a toddler's bouncy house.
My chair bounces up and down and my monitor shakes. This isn't a once-a-day phenomenon. This is because a nervous person can't stop twitching.
I've talked to him about it. Daily. We discussed other outlets for his energy. Putting his feet, standing when he's on the phone, or chewing gum to release energy.
He's either inconsiderate or too fucking dumb to change.
My supervisor just laughs and doesn't do anything about it. I think he fails to consider how much people HATE this guy because he shakes our cubes all day long. Well, I had my final conversation with him. He has been served the final warning.
I will either 1) kill him, or 2) file a complaint. Sic the bastards from HR on his ass.
Rumor is another cubicle is opening up in August. I have called dibs, and I'm not afraid to defend my turf with deadly elbows if necessary.
This is the constant mental state of cubicle worker O4G58G.
Now, remember that picture of cube farm? Bring back the noise, bring back the commotion, and add the bouncy house. Welcome to my job.
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