Careers

It's that time of year again where people give terrible career advice. So, matriculating students, I will tell you how it is.

A woman on talk radio was giving callers career advice, particularly the unhappy ones.

"If you are unhappy in your job, it's because you're not doing what you love."

With advice like that, it's amazing everyone doesn't have a radio show. The woman went on to ask, "what are your hobbies?"

"Well, I really like throwing parties and all my friends say I'm really good at it."

Really, what are your friends going to say? This bridal shower sucks?

"That's fantastic, and definitely something you can make money on. Next time you edit your resume, put together a list of the functions you threw, the dollar amount, and the success. Don't forget to list your friends as references," says the radio lady.

Students and unhappy workers out there, this is shitty advice. You need to come to grips with this. Most likely, your hobby is not going to sustain a reasonable standard of living.

I'll use myself as example. Currently I have enough money to pay the mortgage, pay the bills, do some fun things during the month, and put some away into savings or investments. I also have some stashed away in case of emergencies or wedding invitations. I'm not saying this to brag. Just wanted to let you know where I'm coming from.

My hobby - making dog collars and leashes - does earn me some money. I like sewing, I like making sales. But what I earn in a month doesn't pay HALF the mortgage. If I had followed radio lady's advice, I'd lose my house, car, and everything I worked for.

Besides, a hobby is something you do in your free time. If I had to make collars 8-10 hours a day, I doubt I would like it as much.

I also like dog sitting, watching TV, reading, and sleeping. If there was a way to earn good money from that, everyone would do it.

"But there are some success stories out there", you say. True. I saw the Sam Adams commercials where the guy "never works a day in his life". I probably wouldn't either if I got to spend my life around beer. Before you major in brew-mastering at college, think about all the people at home who make their own beer and haven't found success. There's more than you think.

It's like majoring in theater and expecting to become an A-list Hollywood star. The best advice I can give you is to face the odds. Most people don't become rich and famous.

Before you smack me as a pessimist, I'm not saying to give up on your dreams. Just don't major in them. You like theater? Awesome. Take some classes as an elective. Pursue a minor.

You like reading? Take some creative writing classes. Just don't major in English.

You like dance? Sports? Gardening? Cars?

Find a career that pays well enough to support your hobbies. That's my message to you.

I work with program managers, telecommunication specialists, programmers, engineers, and business professionals. Everyone I talk to has a hobby they do after work and on the weekends. Fishing, biking, hiking, yoga, volunteering. These people go to work, do the best they can, and earn enough money to support their hobbies.

Do you think you can afford acting classes as an unemployed actress? Or an actress working at Denny's? Do you think you can  volunteer at a food bank or animal shelter if you were broke and thinking about your next paycheck? Or get that mountain bike, car rack, and helmet?

"But I don't want to hate my job," you say.

I'm not going to lie to you. I had a job I hated, but it was because my boss was a true <bleep>. It happens, it's horrible, and difficult to get up in the morning. So I got another one. The point is, you might still hate your job if you become a dancer. The people might be asshats and the boss could scream at you. The trick is finding a job where you work well with others and feel like you are accomplishing something. Even if it's being good at project management, or accounting, or programming. Life doesn't suck because you're in a cubicle. And cubicles don't equal unhappiness.

Still don't believe me? Do you think people become engineers because they love machinery, chemicals, and sewage plants? Do people become lawyers because the law is their hobby? Do people become anesthesiologists because they love pain killers? THINK about it.

I know this post is running a little long, so I'll leave you with the last bit of advice. Look up what careers are needed most, as well as what majors earn the most money. Pick the one that sounds the most interesting to you. Then make sure your university offers electives in the stuff you love.